The Avocado Files

Day Three

4 min read

Waiting for total clarity before you act is the most reliable way to make a fast-moving problem worse. When something changes overnight — a reorg, a lost client, a plan that stops working — your brain doesn't need a five-step framework. It needs one accurate sentence, said out loud, about what's actually happening. That's the whole method. It works because of what it does to your amygdala, not because it's clever.

The avocado has been sitting on my counter since Monday. I bought it to make something with. I have not made anything with it. Every morning I look at it, think today, and then don't.

Today is also the day I was supposed to tell my assistant that the way we produce Field Notes is changing — which means telling her that the part of the job she's good at is about to look different. I've known this for two months. I have told no one. I have, instead, developed a rich internal relationship with an avocado.

Yesterday I picked it up to throw it away. Pit still in, browning at one edge, not rotten — just past its best day. I stood at the sink deciding whether it still counted as good, and realized that was the exact question I'd been avoiding about the restructuring. Is this still fine? Or is it over, and I just haven't said so out loud?

I didn't throw it out. I cut around the brown, made guacamole, and it was some of the best I've made all year — off flesh I almost binned out of pure avoidance.

Here's the part that actually matters: standing at my counter spiraling about produce instead of making one phone call isn't a character flaw. It's a nervous system doing exactly what it's built to do under perceived threat — and there's a genuinely simple, research-backed way to interrupt it. It's called affect labeling. Put a specific, accurate word on what's happening — "I'm avoiding this because it's uncomfortable, not because it's wrong" — and UCLA researchers have shown it measurably quiets the amygdala, the part of your brain running the alarm, and hands processing back to the prefrontal cortex, the part that can actually decide something. You don't need to feel ready. You don't need certainty. You need one honest sentence about what's actually happening. That's the whole intervention. It's not a framework. It's barely a technique. It's just the one thing your brain will actually listen to mid-freeze.

NAME THE FREEZE.
THEN MOVE ANYWAY.

I told my assistant this morning. Five sentences, no framework, and it went fine. The avocado didn't have an opinion either way. But I'm fairly sure it was smirking.

Therese Marzouk

Keynote Speaker · Workforce Development Trainer · Writer

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